New Year, New You and Who Knew....

Well, it's no surprise. I woke up this morning dwelling on the past, mainly the night before. Some people may think I am still caught up like a fat kid trying to jump a fence, nope. No atomic thunder chickens here folks. I found out new things, got new hope and still there was the underlying problem of dain bramage and neden games. But it's 2011 actually 1-1-11, nice, that's like looking at the clock and making a wish. Wishful thinking is a bunch of hooey. I mean it's like a nightlight keeping the monster in your closet. For real, make a wish that I come over there and slap you with a herring...am I there yet?

Cat's and kittens life is not a saucer full of anti-freeze it's much, much worse. It's like the hero dying right when he thinks he's beaten the villan and come to find out the bastard has on a bulletproof vest. Or like when an author makes a corny analogy and turns out just to suck....hey!
I talked it over with myself, a few friends and a fifth of 103 proof whiskey, the liquor part was shared (sparingly), tears were shed and a pressed fruitbowl was admired by all, along with a furry gordita and lots of farting. I digest!
I am not giving advice, Hell I usually don't take what I'm given. right now I am holding on to pertinent information, that I am going to keep until I have to use in a way that's funny. Be careful what you say to one person in confidence they might tell the one you don't want to know. Also, lying is not an art, it's not story telling. You aren't sending a script to a big budget Paramount producer. What the fudge, children? I went this whole time swallowing equal parts disgust and pride!

Not to sound snarky but I am going to hold my tongue in someone's best intentions. I am officially boycotting the douchebaggery. Whore-moan-al or not I don't give a skinamax handy J. And what I mean by that is: it may look like we are going through the motions but in actuality, nothing is really happening and both(at least one)of us are going to walk away feeling stupid. Just saying...
I am still carrying a can of petrol and a box of strike em's. There are bridges to burn, knickers to soak and hearts to break. And keep my hands to yourself.
But I will leave on a good note---b sharp!